Tuesday, 7/18/06

Watching 3-Iron on TV. Not a fun movie necessarily, but it has its moments. It's Japanese. Refreshing. Not sure there are any dynamic progressions or anything like in Boot Camp but I like it. It was another extremely hot day in the big apple. Went down to the Chambers Street area to see my lawyer. I had read what he sent me but then when we were in the conference room he said he had emailed me my Affidavit. I was to have read it and made changes if any were needed. I didn't see the email with the affidavit until this evening. So I read it there and made changes. As I was looking at the last page, with the signature line, I saw my name Sylvia was misspelled. They'd spelled it "SLYVIA". I told the lawyer and he fixed it, then I made a few changes. In the ladies room after we had finished, I realized I didn't have a copy. I requested one once I was back in the reception area. I waited and a secretary brought me out a thick package. The caption on the front had SYLVIA but in the body of this opening page they called me Azure. And then it said I had signed the Affidavit on the 14th. She went back and changed those things. I was pissed at the mistakes.

TO BE CONTINUED - TO GET TO THE FUN PART

From Chambers I went back uptown. Another hand therapy/OT appointment. The place was not as restful as the one on Monday - loud unbearable music - but the very thin very short hand therapist gave me lots of exercises that I think will be good for my hand and the tightness in my arm(s). From there it was Whole Foods and then the subway home. I dripped in the subway and got angrier and angrier because I had to feed the cats once I got home and go right back out again. At home the painters were stil outside and i had to be careful where I stepped. Igloo got under foot in the apartment and I stepped on his tail. Of course, Hiro wanted to go out and I ended up yelling at him. I almost cried in the cab down to 15th Street. The cab driver was Indian, although he could have been from Pakistan or Bangladesh. He had an aura that made it difficult to remain angry. He said more than once that he thought it was going to rain, but the skies didn't make it seem so. I felt I didn't know anything in class. I said I'd done a couple of hours work when I hadn't done anyand should have done at least 10. My feedback was not good and I judged myself harshly. I felt stupid and I hate feeling stupid. Earlier I had bought balance bars. Ate 2. I guess generally I felt everything was going to shit: not really losing the weight I wanted to lose, my hand still not WELL so I'm not really playing or writing because of it, running to doctors, not being able to do my walk in the park because of the fucking heat, not knowing what will happen with the apartment lawsuit. And last but not least - hating my kitchen.

TRUST ME, THE FUN PART IS ACTUALLY COMING. YOU WON'T BE ROLLING IN THE AISLES BUT THE HUMOR IS THERE.

Somehow, someway it gets to be 10PM and class is over. No more humiliation for Azure. I go to the bathroom, relieving myself of all the humiliation I've accumulated in my 2 hours, plus, class and who knows what else since the beginning of the day and then I ride the elevator down. I know, people don't really ride eleveators let alone ride them down. They're not horses after all. But this is my blog. At ground level I go to exit and a woman in a red and white skirt or dress goes by and into the elevator. As I keep walking I notice that I'm remarking to myself that she was rather wet. She had dark hair and it seemed to be plastered to her face and her face seemed wet also. I figured she'd been running or maybe she was someone who perspired profusely in the heat. I did think about her dress though and wished I had a dress like it. And as I'm thinking some other silly thought, probably having to do with food, I've arrived at the exit and I see it's bloody pouring. After I curse, my next thought is of my taxicab driver who got his wish. Never in a million years did I believe that one drop of rain was going to fall from the sky as hot and sunny as it was. And even if I had listened to the weather folks I probably wouldn't have wanted to carry one more thing so I would have probably left the umbrella home anyway. What's a summer shower. But it was really pouring.

HERE'S A LITTLE CHUCKLE FOR YOU

You know what I did? I went and asked the 2 guards back in the building, sitting at their little guardstation. The guardstation you have to stop at and show your id and then after you've shown them your id they give you a name tag with your name on it and you walk aways and they press something and these little glass or plastic slide things in front of you that you think you're going to walk into if you keep walking suddenly disappear and the next thing you know you're at the elevators. So that's where I walked back to and asked the guards, excusing myself first because they were chatting, if they'd heard the weather report and if they knew how long it was going to rain. They probably thought I was a total ditz and laughed about me much later, but right then they just kinda said no.

I went back to the doors and watched people in the street walking in the rain. Every so often I would attempt to leave, either through the regular doors or the revolving door. The water had seeped in making little puddles and I tried avoiding them with little success, not wanting my feet nor my sandals to get wet. I put everything I had into 1 bag so nothing would get wet but then I still didn't want to physically get wet. I waited. Soon the woman in the red dress was back with some friends. They went out in the rain. They also had umbrellas. Finally it seemed to have let up some and I
figured I'd better make a break for it. The building entrance was on Ninth Avenue but I had to walk up 15th Street and once I was on my way I realized it ws hardly raining at all. The subway entrance I was headed for on Eighth Avenue was closed so I had to walk another block to 14th Street. As I descended into the subway I almost had to laugh at how panicked and upset I had been. Envisioning myself stranded in the building for hours.

There was a pretty good breeze on the platform right near the tunnel so I waited there, even tho it didn't smell that great. It was on the train that the humor of everything manifested itself.